- I'm a total spaz when driving. Seriously. There are times when I can't believe Pete lets me schlep the girls hither and yon. Like there was the time I didn't see a car coming from my left and pulled out. I tapped it so gently that I barely felt it, but the other car lost control and was totaled. The driver was okay, thank goodness. Last year, as I was leaving the interview for my job, I hit a curb or something with our brand new car and dented the shit out of the side, so I had to go home and tell Pete. That's not the maddest I've seen him, but it was close.
- Once when my in-laws were here, I quietly farted. Only, it wasn't a fart. There was more. Turns out, that was the opening crescendo to several days of a stomach bug. Luckily, only Pete and I knew. And now so do you.
- And while we're on the topic of gastro-intestinal distress, how about vurps?
- I once said "fuck" in front of Elegant's preschool class. Luckily, none of them heard me, including the little shit who had just viciously kicked me.
- The Christmas taht Elegant was four, she would talk about "the little baby Jeeeezus!" Okay, that one's on Pete.
- Or the time Elegant stuck a sippy cup between my boobs and drank like a lamb at a petting zoo. In the grocery store. With people looking. Not long after that, at the end of a long day, I found a toy in my bra. No, I had not noticed it.
- How this parenting moment? And this and this.
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Confessions of a dumb ass
Okay, since Sue is having such a shitty week, I have offered to publicly confess some things that might or might not bring a smile to her face:
at 8:38 PM