Sunday, May 13, 2007

The 3 Rs

On Friday I went to my father's oncology appointment, which is a four hour drive round trip. While on the highway, I faced the typical obstacle course filled with tractor trailers, each jockeying for the best position on the road, even if it meant blocking traffic in both lanes while one behemoth passed another. As I had plenty of time to think while stuck behind the trucks, I got to musing about how to alleviate highway traffic.

Since tractor trailers schlep stuff for Americans near and far, perhaps there's a way to reduce the stuff being schlepped and therefore reduce the number of trucks on the roads. You know, that whole reduce, reuse, recycle thing -- only most people don't reduce.

Here's a partial list of things that I think American manufacturers should cut back on the numbers they produce. Better yet, simply cease to make the following items, and we'll all benefit:
  • Chia Pets -- These serve no purpose whatsoever.
  • Bratz -- Annoying as hell.
  • Precious Moments "collectibles" -- You understand why.
  • Any so-called art by Thomas Kinkade, collectibles based on his art, and even the supplies needed for the stores that sell this crap.
  • All Britney Spears and Celine Dion CDs
  • Lima beans -- fresh or frozen
I could go on and on. In fact, I'm sure I could go up and down the aisles of Hellmart and come up with at least a hundred things that should not be made. Just think of all the raw resources that would be saved, the smaller number of trucks on the roads, and even how much money the average American would save by not buying any of this crap.

And then we could all drive in peace.

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